100 Decibels

Tag: full time dad

  • You are focusing on the wrong thing. Read this.

    When I paid off my 6-figure student loans (and my spouse’s) 4 years ago, I started to shift my focus.

    One of my focuses is not playing status games.

    Some of the things that are no longer my priority are:

    • looking to change the world.
    • looking to build the next big thing.
    • looking to pursue a title.
    • looking for more projects, people, etc.

    I used to think of wanting to get the highest valuation (i.e. profit) but that changed…

    Where I am in life now with a growing family, I shift my focus to:

    • spend time with my wife and toddlers.
    • fly out to visit my family and in-laws anytime.
    • work on projects that will have an impact.
    • have meaningful conversations.

    When you list out priorities in your life, it can change the course of action. Then, you start to take a different path with intentionality.

    What are you doing now? Living someone else’s life? Or living your own?

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  • Advice I would give to my teenage self

    What advice would you give to your teenage self?

    The one advice I would give to my teenage self is a higher education degree does not necessarily correlate with a higher salary.

    Sure, it depends on the speciality but is not necessarily true for all degrees. In my case, all my degrees are liberal arts degrees.

    Another thing I’d add is that being a high paid employee doesn’t guarantee financial freedom. At the end of the day, employees are taxed. And especially more when they’re on the higher tax bracket.

    So, I’ll encourage my teenage self to explore the entrepreneurship path as well. This will come along with other skills to be developed as well.

    Anything else you’ll like to add that you want to advise to your teenage self?

  • The ONE Thing I Usually Do When Picking Up Groceries

    The other day I went to pick up groceries. You know when you order groceries through an app then you get assigned a date and time when they’re ready to be picked up? That.

    Sometimes I go by myself, sometimes with my wife, or with my toddler. Or all of them together. Anyway, at times, when I go by myself or just with my toddlers, I’d arrive and park at the stall. Then I’ll call the number on the stall through on-demand interpreting services. Or most know this as VRS. Then I’d give the name and stall number I’m parked in. Then while waiting, if I’m by myself, I’ll be taking the time to think about my next post or just simply take the time to meditate. If I’m with the kids, then I’ll have a conversation with them.

    Then when the employee comes out with the groceries, I’d typically get out to open the trunk. Usually, my intention is to at least connect with a basic conversation with them. First, I’d sign, “How are you?” The expected response is they freeze like a deer caught in headlights. Then I get sure with the thumbs up. This typically eases the tension. Then I’d get back in the car and let them load the groceries into the trunk. After they’re done, they usually know to get my attention or make eye contact with me before they close the trunk then go. This usually ends with a wave or thumbs up.

    Now, for those you watching or reading this, what would you do in a similar situation like this and why? Comment below. I’m curious to know.

  • Day One

    A couple of weeks ago, I started following some fathers or dads with social media accounts. Since I’m a dad, of course, I was curious to know what others were doing. I was intrigued. What triggered me to look for accounts for ideas and inspiration is that I am Deaf and a dad. Hence, you see me use these together Deaf dad. Just pronouncing this rolls off my tongue well. It’s like music and beats on my tongue. Anyway, yes, as a Deaf dad, I bump into other parents at my toddler’s school. These parents are not Deaf and they don’t know ASL. So, there is usually some barrier imposed between us each time we’re there in person. Kind of like a glass wall between us where we make eye contact, smile and wave. Then give the thumbs-up gesture on how we’re doing then we move on to doing what we have to do with our kids.

    These parents have never met or known Deaf people or the community. Or are aware of what values lie within being Deaf and using ASL as a natural language. There have been times when we say we like to get together to learn ASL. Usually, this doesn’t happen. So, this is where I come in. I’ll be more active and intentional with my presence on social media as a Deaf dad. Of course, the most important thing, I want to do as a Deaf dad is to be there for my kids. As well as be there for my spouse. Be the Deaf dad I want to be for my family. I’m not gonna lie, it’s hard. Hard to do while working a full-time job, doing freelance work, and Deaf dad duties.

    So, this is my Day One post. Or maybe Week One. Originally, I wanted to post weekly blogs and as I started, my fingers just rolled into typing Day One. So, I’ll roll with it.

    Thanks for reading this far! This is the beginning of my blogging about my Deaf dad journey here. Actually, I think I’ll go with Deaf dad diary. Will roll with it as well. Anyway, comment below! So I can get to know you and what you’d like to learn as I go!